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Chucky’s Week 6 Predictions

Chucky had a rough weekend after being convinced he had contracted the Ebola virus. Turns out, he’d just swallowed a moth.

Columbia Central @ Blissfield: Blissfield’s team name is the Royals and they may draw some inspiration from baseball’s Kansas City Royals – but probably not. PICK: Columbia Central

Concord @ Athens: In an effort to keep their team from suffering any more injuries, Yellow Jacket coaches encase the team bus in bubble wrap for the drive to Athens. The ploy works. PICK: Concord

Okemos @ Jackson: The Chiefs stop at that new Speedway Convenience Store on Wisner before heading over to the game and stock up on .52 ounce Club Chill sodas. Man, those are sure tasty. PICK: Okemos

Napoleon @ Addison: Confusion reigns when someone replaces the game ball with a small pumpkin. PICK: Napoleon

Vandercook Lake @ Hanover-Horton: The Comets are confused when, at the beginning of the game, they get dizzy staring at those weird feathers on the Vandy helmets. The dizziness passes just in time. PICK: H-H

Western @ Harper Creek: A Western fan turns loose a live panther before the game as a joke. No one’s laughing, however, when it eats all of the food at the concession stand and throws up in the end zone. PICK: Harper Creek

Pennfield @ Northwest: Proof of alien life in the universe takes place at halftime when a huge UFO lands at midfield. However it interferes with the marching bands routine and is booed back into space. PICK: Pennfield

Manchester @ Grass Lake: The Dutch are still stinging from a loss to Grass Lake in last year’s playoffs. Sadly, they learn the stinging is actually from a hornet that got stuck in their shorts. PICK: Manchester

Hillsdale @ Onsted: Petoskey resident Chris Godfrey makes the four hour trek in a Lincoln Town Car and erects a creepy scarecrow near the football field and most people stay clear of it. Sadly, it makes off with a trombone player in the third quarter. Not sure what that was all about. PICK: Hillsdale

Stockbridge @ Olivet: Stockbridge allowed 64 points last week – and still won. Nothing else to put here. That stat just sort of boggles the mind. PICK: Olivet

Coldwater @ Lumen Christi: The Titans are 26-0 all-time against Coldwater. That has to end sometime, right? I mean, doesn’t it? PICK: LC

Week 6 Football Schedule

Columbia Central at Blissfield

Concord at Athens

Okemos at Jackson

Napoleon at Addison

Vandercook Lake at Hanover-Horton – JTV

Western at Harper Creek

Pennfield at Northwest

Manchester at Grass Lake – JTV

Hillsdale at Onsted

Stockbridge at Olivet

Coldwater at Lumen Christi – JTV

Week 5 Football Schedule

Ida (4-0) at Columbia Central (0-4)

Hanover-Horton (4-0) at Manchester (3-1)

Grand Ledge (2-2) at Jackson (3-1)

Marshall (1-3) at Lumen Christi (4-0) Saturday

Michigan Center (0-4) at Napoleon (2-2)

Northwest (0-4) at Coldwater (4-0)

Addison (0-4) at Vandercook Lake (3-1)

Western (2-2) at Charlotte (1-3)

Homer (4-0) at Jonesville (3-1)

Detroit Allen Academy (0-4) at Grass Lake (4-0)

Erie Mason (1-3) at Hillsdale (3-1)

Perry (1-3) at Stockbridge (3-1)

Reading (2-2) at Concord (0-4)

Chucky’s Week 5 Picks

Perfection – thy name is Chucky Buckles. That’s right, kids, ‘ol Chucky became the first feline to achieve a Zen-like state with last week’s perfect 10-0 record in the picks. Something like that hadn’t been done since the Great Helsinki Incident of 1922, and I think we all know how that turned out. But Chucky’s work is never done…

Ida @ Columbia Central: Ida’s team name is the Blue Streaks. The last time Chucky had blue streaks he spent a week in the clinic. PICK: Ida

Hanover-Horton @ Manchester: The Comets are in rarified air at 4-0, but the Dutch aren’t impressed. They secretly replace the fine Gatorade they usually serve the visiting team with Folger’s Crystals. Google it. PICK: Manchester

Grand Ledge @ Jackson: The Ledge’s mascot, ‘Ronny the Ram,’ breaks loose in the third quarter and goes on the run. He later enters the game and kicks a field goal to add insult to injury. PICK: Grand Ledge

Marshall @ Lumen Christi: In a highly controversial move, Marshall High administrators agree to change their team name again, this time from Red Hawks to Mathers. Only a handful are impressed. PICK: Lumen Christi

Michigan Center @ Napoleon: Trying to give the team a boost, MC fans drag along the giant, inflatable cardinal to this game. Sadly, they fill it with pure helium and it floats away. Later it’s shot down by F-18’s somewhere over Washington. No charges are filed. PICK: Napoleon

Northwest @ Coldwater: The Mounties stop on their way to Coldwater to help a pair of old ladies who need a tire changed. Fearing the worst, the ladies kick each Mountie player in the shin and this really, really hurts. PICK: Coldwater

Addison @ Vandercook Lake: Addison skips the game altogether and instead enjoys a team meal at the new Klavon’s location. Vandy accepts the forfeit, 2-0, along with some cheesy bread. PICK: Vandercook Lake

Western @ Charlotte: Western fans release a wild panther at the game, which probably isn’t a smart move. It then mauls a Charlotte fan lathered in meat sauce. Which begs the question – who brings a live panther to a football game? PICK: Western

Homer @ Jonesville: In the annual battle for the ‘Ol Rusty Boot,’ Homer wins out. It’s later revealed that there was never an ‘ol rusty boot’ because boots are made of leather. PICK: Homer

Detroit Allen Academy @ Grass Lake: Warrior coaches told the players they’d be seeing ‘The Maze Runner’ instead of playing a game this weekend because of East Jackson forfeiting. Furious over missing out on all that buttered popcorn, Grass Lake pummels their visitors. PICK: Grass Lake

Erie-Mason @ Hillsdale: ‘Ancient Astronaut Theorists’ suggest aliens may have shaped our world. This begs the question – How does one become an ‘ancient astronaut theorist?’ PICK: Hillsdale

Perry @ Stockbridge: A controversy is brewing in Stockbridge, where a group of residents are trying to change the town’s name to ‘Stonehenge.’ While this doesn’t make much sense, it’s a heck of a story. PICK: Stockbridge

Rockford @ Caledonia: Rockford’s equipment is stolen before the game, forcing the Rams to play the contest with big bean bags duct taped to themselves. The whole thing is kind of silly. PICK: Rockford

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